I deleted someone’s video card by accident the other day. I felt horrible; actually drenched with guilt. How could I have done that?… I questioned. Someone’s work just gone without explanation. How will I explain this to them? I was trying to be efficient, I downloaded the clips I needed and just wiped the card clean. I was concerned. Did I do this on purpose? Was it just unexplained human error?
Maybe I was wiped. Tired. Overworked. Wiped out like the video card. Can a person’s brain be too full? Am I doing too much? Are we so bogged down, that we can only see what is right in front of us? I felt like at the moment, my work was more important; at least subconsciously. I had a mission, a checklist of things I had to get done. And, I got it done. Good for me. But, there are others to think about. And I didn’t think…at least not for more than a moment.
Job, kids, spouses, etc. keep us on our toes. Juggle or fail. Avoid getting wiped out, or the rest of the dominos fall. Well, I caused someone else’s dominos to fall. And, for that I am sorry. I don’t know to what extent I effected them, but their work was gone and I was the reason.
I was forgiven, when I confessed my error. But, I know it was just because I’ve been wiped out. I couldn’t honestly explain that to her without being achingly vulnerable. I matter-of-factly stated what happened and waited for a response. I hated myself for being so detached, when inside I felt horrible. She accepted the situation and moved forward.
I’m trying to make it rain in my personal life, my professional life and everything in between. There’s no room for error, especially when the error effects others. I have to avoid being wiped. Being tired or complacent reeks of failure, a situation I have to avoid. Keeping others in mind is as important as the breath that I take, and I have to remember that.
I have learned from my mistakes.